About
What have you experienced at church? Beautiful things? Difficult things? Things that make you laugh (or cry) still? Jesus Christ overcame all things. He understands church hurt, coercion, and spiritual abuse because He experienced it in His faith community too. Then, He overcame.
I've heard it said that "good inspiration is based on good information" and that's what you'll find on this faith-affirming site. (See "Support" for inclusive resources for all faiths.) Our Savior is helping many heal. He wants us to overcome coercion and spiritual abuse! He is helping faith communities become healthier!
If you're looking for personal stories about healing or responding well to imperfect interactions at church or influencing teen faith without shame, visit my blog. ​​​
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- Jen
Hello!
​My name is Jen.
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I grew up in a loving, devout home in California. A true child of the 80’s, I was raised on beach trips, roller skates, MTV, and so, so many family movie nights.
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As a child, I went to church with my family, and I attended religious schools. Church and school cemented my belief in Jesus Christ! But as I entered adolescence, my family switched congregations and I started a new religious school. When my relationship with Christ led me to a new church, what should have been a deeply personal experience became a reason to shame and threaten me. This continued in religious settings for three years.
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In college, I embraced my new faith and felt joy! But compulsions to please my peers at church started affecting how I lived my faith. After years of anxiety and breakdowns, my Savior gave me resilience. Then, life got complicated. My husband was called as lay leader of our congregation just as our kids were becoming teens. That felt like mini extensions of myself at church. As imperfect interactions piled on, so did the "bad" feelings. In other places, I could use my agency to respond to conflict. Why couldn't I do that at church? Eventually, my Savior showed me the impact of earlier experiences and how not to repeat coercive patterns. He also led me to an evidence-based trauma therapy called EMDR through my church's social services. Now, I have my agency back. I have a beautiful new normal. My Savior has healed my spiritual wounds.
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Maybe you've noticed definitions of spiritual abuse that blacklist entire faith communities. That's all-or-nothing thinking! Remember how Jesus ate with "sinners?" He kept everyone at the table, which is my goal here. Check out "Support" for helpful resources that are evidence-based. If it's personal stories you need, check out my blog.
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Your friend in Christ (and hope and change!),
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Jennifer Weaver
The Book
The Girl Who Dropped Jesus is my upcoming memoir that recounts beautiful, humorous, and difficult experiences within two faith communities at the center of my life for the last fifty years.
From childhood mishaps (like dropping Jesus in church and being shamed by a clergyman) to barely surviving a faith change at a religious high school, from mentoring my teens to coming to terms with my unresolved adolescence, when it comes to spiritual wounds, I've seen many. But my Savior has helped me heal.
